October 5th, 2006

Hey I'm doing the news here

Democrats are supposed to be better than us!

Dennis Hastert must think Earth logic is quaint. And admittedly, for republicans it may be so. With dirty dealers like Rove orchestrating the spin, the truth is discarded for truthiness.

So, let's run Foleygate through. Foley cybers underage boys. Foley gets found out and is reported to party leaders at least last year, possibly much earlier. GOP party leaders hush it up. It gets leaked to ABC News.

Who is at fault? DEMOCRATS! GEORGE SOROS. CLINTON'S PENIS! (Clenis) *ahem*, that was actually Hannity. But honestly, can't everything be blamed on Clenis? For such a dastardly fellow, you'd think Clenis would be online in living color.

Anyway, back to Hastert (not evil like Clenis) --credit to Salon's War Room

In an interview with the Chicago Tribune Wednesday night, Hastert blamed both ABC News and Democratic operatives for orchestrating an ambush on the GOP. "I think the base has to realize after a while, who knew about it? Who knew what, when?" Hastert said. "When the base finds out who's feeding this monster, they're not going to be happy. The people who want to see this thing blow up are ABC News and a lot of Democratic operatives, people funded by George Soros."

Hastert was unable to offer any proof of a liberal conspiracy. "All I know is what I hear and what I see," he told the Tribune. "I saw Bill Clinton's adviser, Richard Morris, was saying these guys knew about this all along. If somebody had this info, when they had it, we could have dealt with it then."

Here's what Morris wrote about Foleygate Wednesday: "It is not that the voters believe that all congressmen are child molesters, nor is it the details of what Speaker Dennis Hastert knew, and when he knew it, that makes this scandal so important. Its centrality stems from the sheer arrogance and hypocrisy it demonstrates both on the part of Foley himself and his colleagues who hushed up the affair until it burst onto the public stage ... It is not Foley who is sinking his party. Its own misdeeds have already sunk it."

For the record, Richard "Dick" Morris was a Clinton advisor that switched sides and now is a right-wing pundit. But let's get this straight, Hastert's inaction was the democrats fault? If Hastert is where the buck stops (as indicated by Reps. Boehner, Reynolds and Shimkus who felt they satisfied their duty by reporting the situation to their "supervisor"), then it would follow that it was up to him to do something about it, yes? Even if some dems knew, isn't it still your place to do something about it? Just asking!

(sung to tune of "Blame Canada!")
Everyone: Blame Democrats
It seems that everything's gone wrong
Since Democrats came along!
Everyone: Blame Democrats!
Blame Democrats!
Some Guy: They're not even a real party, anyway