August 3rd, 2007

Strong Bad-Tally Ho

Deadly Office Sins

Burnt popcorn is one of the worst office sins a coworker can commit. The smell is ghastly and it travels far to infect all unblocked areas. And then? It lingers on and on.

I had been lucky enough not to experience this for quite some time. Ahh, but yesterday I was besieged by that acrid stench. And believe, one whiff will do ya. I walked down a long corridor and no matter how far you went (my building is 1/4 of mile long) that foul scent wafted like bad perfume. There's an open area in the center of the building where the first and second floors share air. My office suite is on the second floor. And the scent was palpable up there, too. Not till I walked into my office suite did I escape the scent.

Worst of all, I seemed to develop the olfactory version of having a song stuck in your head. After I left the building, I swore I could still smell burnt popcorn in my car. And I even thought I could occasionally catch a whiff at home. Clearly this had to be some psychological quirk. I couldn't really be smelling it there, unless somehow my clothes absorbed the scent. And yet, it really seemed like I did.

I confess, I burned popcorn at work before. However, I vowed never to do it again. I'd rather have some extra unpopped kernels than to pollute where I live during the day.

So, have I made my opinion on burnt popcorn in the workplace clear enough? Heh. Would it be inappropriate to say I have a burning hate for burnt popcorn?
ha ha

I'd like to think she's doing for the lulz

...but somehow I don't have that faith in her intellect.

Socialite Paris Hilton's plans to drive an environmentally friendly vehicle have hit a roadblock - the car she was thinking of buying doesn't exist.

The 26-year-old socialite-turned-reality TV star recently announced she'd ordered a "Hummer hybrid".

But a Hummer spokesman says, "Such a car doesn't exist."

More Direct Source

What kind of gas mileage would you think this hypothetical Hummer hybrid would get? I bet Jon Stewart is pissed she came up with the idea (tragically unironically) first.

The stupid, it burns.
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